It's Just Your Imagination – Growing Up With a Narcissistic Mother - Insights of a personal Journey

It's Just Your Imagination
142 Pages
ISBN 978-0-692-08695-7

Narcissism In The Family Pinnacle Book Achievement Award, "It`s Just Your Imagination" explores what it’s like to grow up with a mother who insists on putting herself at the center of every situation. This book gives you the tools to live a pain-free life, if you were raised by a narcissistic mother. This first-hand account of my personal journey offers a vicarious understanding of maternal narcissism and its implications. With the aid of supporting psychological studies, you will learn how you, too, can overcome the challenges of growing up in a household driven by narcissism.

“It is a great honor to recommend Revital Shiri-Horowitz memoir. The deep and personal stories about her healing journey are told with such honesty, they take your breath away. This author is an amazing woman with thoughtful integrity and grinding determination to heal from the inevitable damage caused by a narcissistic parent. She shares her insights as she progresses through my 5-step recovery model. This book will inspire other daughters of narcissistic mothers to delve into the important work of uncovering the authentic self so that joy and hope replace despair. Thank you Revital for your courage and strength to want to help others in recovery.” Dr. Karyl McBride, author of “Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers.”

An Israeli author offers advice on breaking free from familial cycles of manipulation and conditional love.

Shiri-Horowitz (Hope to See You Soon, 2014, etc.) grew up with a possessive, critical mother. It’s a vicious cycle, she argues: Women who lacked a mother’s unconditional love repeat the same pattern of treatment when they become parents. Her own mother “remained hurt, and hurtful. She copied her mother’s maternal paradigm.” The first chapter helpfully sets out the 10 characteristics of narcissistic mothers. These include concern with appearances, jealousy between mother and daughter, and a lack of respect for the child’s individual identity. In this framework, the father is often a passive partner who tries feebly to make peace. Shiri-Horowitz describes her father as “weak,” “overshadowed,” and absent-seeming. Emotional neglect is a powerful force, the author contends, and contrasts with the seeming perfection of a family seen from the outside: Her mother kept up a convincing facade, with her home and children well-kempt. No one could have guessed there was emotional abuse behind the scenes. At times, this edged into physical abuse, as when her mother threw her to the floor while verbally disowning her. Shiri-Horowitz capably weaves telling incidents from her own history with the psychological insights she has gained into narcissism. She stresses the importance of setting boundaries and finding your own voice, such as by writing a letter to your childhood self. A final poem is especially effective at dramatizing the battle of wills between mother and daughter: “Mom, you do not know / Where you start and where I / End—you are not me and I am not you.” This volume will undoubtedly be helpful to readers who recognize their own families here. It’s a short and well-structured work, though it repeats some facts (for example, the author’s mother hurling her to the floor). The book is also heavily indebted to Karyl McBride’s Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers. Kirkus book review.

A succinct and useful self-help guide for those who have been emotionally damaged by narcissists. “An excellent book for women with Narcissistic mothers. Our perceptions as innocent children are generally accurate, don't let anyone try to convince you otherwise. This journey will help you learn how to recover from a devastating relationship”. Amazon reviewer “This book is an absolute must-read! I wish I had this book when I was raising my three kids. It is full of important insight into how one's words and actions as a parent could impact your children. For those readers who are looking to learn more about how our behavior affects those around us and want to improve their relationships with their loved ones, I highly recommend this book.” Amazon reviewer.

Revital, Horowitz

About Revital, Horowitz (Seattle, Washington Author)

Revital, Horowitz

Revital Shiri-Horowitz was born in 1965 and grew up in Israel. From an early age she wrote poems and stories, and even kept a diary from the age of ten. Shiri-Horowitz served in the IDF.

Shiri-Horowitz Holds two MA degrees in Hebrew Literature and Geography, from Tel Aviv University and Haifa University. She is the Author of the books Daughters of Iraq and Hope to See You Soon. She is a blogger and a poet. She wirtes in English and in Hebrew. Shiri-Horowitz lectures about her books all over the world.

Shiri-Horowitz is a wife and a mother of four boys. She lives in Bellevue, Washington.

These days, Shiri-Horowitz is working on two novels. One is a biography of an injured soldier in the first Lebanon War, and the other is a novel based on a personal story. She blogs in "The Marker", "Wordpress" and writes for "Seattlon”,

Shiri-Horowitz is volunteer and an active participant in her community, she loves reading, writing, traveling and meeting friends and family.